This summer, I have spent 7 weeks so far and 1 week to go at a Little Sisters of the Poor Nursing Home in Alabama. This is a actually a class through the Center for Social Concerns at Notre Dame on service called an SSLP (Summer Service Learning Program). This week we read and wrote about suffering. I wanted to share what I wrote because I wish everyone could be able to see what I have seen and learned what I have these past 7 weeks.
When I really think about it, I have to admit that the place where we (myself and Maddy, my co-SSLP student here and friend) have spent our summer is truly a place of suffering. Saying that doesn’t seem right because there is such a sense of love and hope and vitality here, but the truth is that everyone here is suffering an incredible amount. Not only does everyone here have health problems, including terrible aches and pains, but they also deal with loneliness and the loss of their independence, which are debatably much worse than their health problems. Not only that, but everyone here has lived a full life in a world that is often very cruel, and so many of them have dealt with incredible trauma and loss. Some of the residents have endured unimaginable abuse in their lives, some have seen every member of their family die, and others have never even had families. Many of them probably feel that they are burdens to their families and others wait to die alone. Even writing this I am getting depressed.
So why then, when I think about my time here, does it seem to be filled with joy? Why will this place always remain in memory as a house of hope and life, instead of death and despair? I think there are many answers to that question: and at the center of it all is the Trinity. The Christian faith gives us hope of a Father who loves us unconditionally and has adopted us as His children, Jesus who died for us and opened the doors to Heaven to live with Him forever, and the Holy Spirit who remains with us always. This hope transforms the earthly sufferings of so many of our residents and gives them joy.
I truly believe, after spending so much time here, that this hope would be so much farther away from the residents, so seemingly unattainable, if there were not people here to exemplify this hope for them and make it real, instead of some far-off idea. I believe the Sisters and staff and other residents here have been called by God (and very remarkably responded to that call) to show the love and the hope of Christ to all our residents who are so filled with suffering. As Fr. Himes so beautifully put it, “The Christian response to evil must be the affirmation of goodness of the finite being. So we are all engaged in affirming and fulfilling our being, not denying it. And that fulfilling of our being is our capacity for self-gift.” The Sisters and other workers and even residents here combat the evils of this world and heal the suffering of those around them through the gift of their self and their love.
I love the question posed by Fr. Nouwen in the reading, “Who can take away suffering without entering it?” I believe the answer is no one. Those who serve at this home know that, and have taught that to Maddy and I. The Sisters stay with residents in the hospital and when they die and the whole community mourns with their families and joins in prayer for all those who need it. This attitude of self-gift is infectious, and I am so thankful Maddy and I have caught the bug. We have, through the grace of God, truly come to understand “the basic principle that no one can help anyone without becoming involved, without entering wholly into the painful situation, without taking the risk of becoming hurt, wounded, or even destroyed in the process.” Everyone here has opened their hearts to us, and we have opened ours to them. This love, this agape that truly IS God, does not end their suffering, but transforms it and gives those who experience it the ability to overcome it. I am truly blessed to have been able to learn this lesson from such beautiful people and know I will carry it with me for the rest of my life.
love is the answer 